July 17, 2012

Hmm, I think I’m finally done fighting with my parents. Hey, just because they’re dead doesn’t mean the battles go away! The difference is that as my own person, I’m no longer suffocated by their tough love. Which means I’m ready to refocus my blog….

If you’ve noticed, I’ve just updated my logo with a new photo of busy me toting some modern day tools with a one-sentence blurb summarizing what this blog is about: “Recovering daughter of strict Chinese immigrants…with new life skills, I’m happy at last!”

Part of me hesitates to add the ethnic reference because I’m concerned it might turn off my  diverse blog audience. I don’t want to lose any of you. As a citizen of the world and mother of a multiracial daughter, I need to be in a mixed community, not one that’s filled with only Asians.

On the other hand, there’s no getting around the fact that I know a lot about the ways most some Chinese parents emotionally torture their kids with the best of intentions. It would make me so happy if sharing my specific experiences helps others from Asian cultures — and any oppressive environment — to break outta the box.

By the way, no one asked me if I wanted to be born to Chinese parents; they were just my ticket into this universe. So I’m hoping now to make peace with my passport. I am accepting the specific setting of my life as the launch point for an exploration of universal themes related to self-expression, creativity, love and personal happiness.

Of course, in order to be successful with this evolving branding game plan, I need your feedback. Depending on your comments, I’m prepared to make changes and brainstorm some more. Any observations you have are most welcome because I trust your judgement. You haven’t steered me wrong yet!

In addition to the new stated theme, I’m fussing over the photos too. Even though you can’t tell I’m holding a wooden spoon with the paint brush or see the pen I’m holding along with the iPhone, does the logo shot work? I fiddled with the author box that appears at the end of each post. (In the photo directly below, the author box is the rectangle in the upper right corner.) I’m worried about my gravatar in the author box. It’s a little headshot cropped from the full body photo — does it look like I have no neck? In case you want a last look at the old logo, it’s in the shot on the lower right corner.

P.S. — I’ve got other ideas rattling around inside of me, waiting to get out. But one step at a time. First, I need your comments on the new look. As always, thank you for being here with your generous, wonderful energy. xo

P.P.S. — My shrink, Paul Greene is my rock. During yesterday morning’s session, I went on a bit about how I’m constantly fighting myself, which is exhausting. Makes it hard to complete projects. We talk about when I’m able to be free of that and now I know — when things are fun, things happen. I thought about that all day. And by the end of the day, I had this new blog design. For those of you new to my history on the shrink front, you might like this post: Parents like Amy Chua are the reason Asian Americans like me are in therapy.

P.P.P.S. — Also thanks to my blogging buddy, Mary Quigley. Yesterday afternoon, she talked me through my anxiety about creating a new theme. I  kept trying out blurbs on her and they all sucked. Then just as we were about to end the conversation, I said in off-handedly in closing, “This is really about being a recovering daughter of Chinese immigrant parents…” And we both heard it. “That’s it! That’s your elevator pitch!” she said. For more on how that filtering process works, please check out my post: What is a nut graf? 

P.P.P.P.S. — I will always believe that my mother had a hand in this blog post beacause Sunday, July 15 would have been her 94th birthday. And I totally forgot (until my sister reminded me). With this new blog focus, Mom is front and center as my muse, making sure I’ll never forget her again. Btw, I can’t even remember the date of my dad’s birthday. He’s been dead since I was 19. But now they both get VIP seats in this online living room of ours. Welcome, Mom and Dad. I love you both, more than ever, because you can’t hurt me anymore. xo.