family portrait

How my Asian mom made me nuts: a love story

betty ming liu Relationships 2 Comments

Mothers get blamed for everything. So if you want to know why I turned out this way, just look at my mom. She was a diva in denial who did and said crazy things. Figuring out where she ends and I begin has become my life’s work. If she hadn’t left this world in 2010, she would’ve been celebrating her …

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NEWS SHOT

Open letter to Chinese American moms #blacklivesmatter

betty ming liu Inspiration, Relationships 17 Comments

If you’re reading this and you’re not Chinese, American or Mom, please stay — and welcome! You are essential to the conversation too. It’s just that I feel a need to talk directly with a group that looks most like me, to reassure us that we are not alone. Dear Chinese American Moms, I am reaching out to you because …

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Happy Father's Day

Accepting my dad for who he is

betty ming liu Relationships 5 Comments

This year, I’m giving my dad a very special Father’s Day gift: unconditional love. So what if he’s been dead for 41 years. Remember, parents never really die. Besides, it’s never too late, right? My father crushed his family — Mom, my kid sister, me — with tough love. As a cranky Vietnamese-Chinese immigrant struggling with survival issues in America, …

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newspaper poem

Reflecting on fear, back pain, new projects & the healing power of poetry

betty ming liu Health, Writing how-to's 12 Comments

Ouch. Ouch. Easy, girl. Earlier this week, wrenching my back led to three, solid immobilized days in bed. Even though I’m up again, recovery is slow. The back is tender. So am I. Three painful, prone, motionless days took me to a deeper truth. I had to deal with not just physical crippling but an emotional one. Lately, I’ve been stressed about …

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front desk

Dealing with the sudden, tragic death of friends

betty ming liu Relationships 25 Comments

In the last two weeks, two friends died in separate, unrelated car accidents. Dealing with their deaths pushed me into a sad, heightened state of self-awareness. Missing them makes me realize that all true friendships are precious. Sharing about them now is the only way to keep them close. They taught me stuff I didn’t know about love. Writing about …

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hamburger on porch 700

Why Chinese American women gain weight

betty ming liu Food, Health 19 Comments

In 2016, I must lose 16 pounds. Doctors’ orders. Otherwise, diabetes and achy knees will ruin my future. But here’s my other problem: Chinese American women face special issues in losing weight and eating healthy. According to recent studies, genes and culture create problems in very specific ways. The issues apply to both Chinese immigrant women and American-Born Chinese — …

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