How my dad’s forgiveness freed me from perfectionism

betty ming liu Relationships 4 Comments

I used to to think that sex and finances were the toughest topics to write about. This post beats them both because I struggle so deeply with unresolved daddy-daughter issues. But I recently said something to my father that represents a complete shift in our relationship. My adult life might finally be in my own hands. First, full disclosure. Since …

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Happy Father's Day

Accepting my dad for who he is

betty ming liu Relationships 5 Comments

This year, I’m giving my dad a very special Father’s Day gift: unconditional love. So what if he’s been dead for 41 years. Remember, parents never really die. Besides, it’s never too late, right? My father crushed his family — Mom, my kid sister, me — with tough love. As a cranky Vietnamese-Chinese immigrant struggling with survival issues in America, …

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newspaper poem

Reflecting on fear, back pain, new projects & the healing power of poetry

betty ming liu Health, Writing how-to's 12 Comments

Ouch. Ouch. Easy, girl. Earlier this week, wrenching my back led to three, solid immobilized days in bed. Even though I’m up again, recovery is slow. The back is tender. So am I. Three painful, prone, motionless days took me to a deeper truth. I had to deal with not just physical crippling but an emotional one. Lately, I’ve been stressed about …

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Say these 4 things to change a relationship

betty ming liu Inspiration, Relationships 14 Comments

For most of our lives, my younger sister and I had A Difficult Relationship. For this, we hold our parents responsible. They constantly compared us to each other, pushing us to be twin success stories. When we were little, our mom even dressed us in identical outfits. We grew up feeling competitive and judgemental of each other. Then a year ago, …

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jennifer pan

5 reasons why being in a Chinese family is murder & ways to break the cycle

betty ming liu Relationships 20 Comments

Jennifer Pan’s parents pushed her to be the perfect daughter. But once she grew up, she hired hit men to kill them. Her story is about more than girl gone bad. Asian family values are detonating in the 21st century. And we must do something about it.  Jennifer’s story & our personal stories I found some research studies that might …

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My money story on NPR: Chinese family vs. personal happiness

betty ming liu Money 21 Comments

As a huge fan of National Public Radio, I’m THRILLED to be featured on Marketplace. The NPR show, which is about personal finance and business, wanted to know how my immigrant parents impacted my money values. This is one of my favorite topics. How we handle our finances is so revealing! Follow the money trail and you can decode the story …

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