my drums

The challenges of empty nesting & more

betty ming liu Health, Relationships 24 Comments

Here we go again. Another cycle of reinvention. All my loved ones have flown the nest. Boo-hoo. Poor me. Even though I learned to be alone after my 2001 divorce, this time it’s different. This time, I’m not bleeding emotional wounds from ripping apart a marriage. Instead, I’m facing typical first-world lifestyle transitions: The young adult daughter, living away from …

Tags: , , ,

perfection_mantra

How my dad’s forgiveness freed me from perfectionism

betty ming liu Relationships 4 Comments

I used to to think that sex and finances were the toughest topics to write about. This post beats them both because I struggle so deeply with unresolved daddy-daughter issues. But I recently said something to my father that represents a complete shift in our relationship. My adult life might finally be in my own hands. First, full disclosure. Since …

Tags: , ,

family portrait

How my Asian mom made me nuts: a love story

betty ming liu Relationships 1 Comment

Mothers get blamed for everything. So if you want to know why I turned out this way, just look at my mom. She was a diva in denial who did and said crazy things. Figuring out where she ends and I begin has become my life’s work. If she hadn’t left this world in 2010, she would’ve been celebrating her …

Tags: , , , ,

NEWS SHOT

Open letter to Chinese American moms #blacklivesmatter

betty ming liu Inspiration, Relationships 18 Comments

If you’re reading this and you’re not Chinese, American or Mom, please stay — and welcome! You are essential to the conversation too. It’s just that I feel a need to talk directly with a group that looks most like me, to reassure us that we are not alone. Dear Chinese American Moms, I am reaching out to you because …

Tags: , , ,

bird feature

Practicing the art of flying at LaGuardia Airport

betty ming liu Relationships, Travel 4 Comments

Hello from Ann Arbor, Michigan! I just arrived for a week in my new Midwestern home-away-from-home. The flight from New York was such a horror show that it got me reflecting on My Journey: What do 21st century travelers need to survive airplanes and life in general? I always find the patience to go on from a wise writer who …

Tags: , ,

Happy Father's Day

Accepting my dad for who he is

betty ming liu Relationships 5 Comments

This year, I’m giving my dad a very special Father’s Day gift: unconditional love. So what if he’s been dead for 41 years. Remember, parents never really die. Besides, it’s never too late, right? My father crushed his family — Mom, my kid sister, me — with tough love. As a cranky Vietnamese-Chinese immigrant struggling with survival issues in America, …

Tags: , , , , , ,