I survived turning 60! And I’m here to report that tipping past the half-century decade offers new options for fabulousness. To enjoy it, I just need to get out of my own way and embrace (more) change.
For instance, I’ve always been one of those people who also feared turning 20, 30, 40 and 50. I was afraid these milestones would prove me a loser, a woman who hadn’t achieved enough, who had wasted her shot at becoming a sexy and successful goddess.
While sex, success and godliness are still important <smile>, how I define them keeps transforming as I outgrow my need to please and impress.
These days, I care less about appearances and more about how I feel mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It’s the inner Betty that counts. Letting go of angst, competitiveness and striving feels really good.
Getting to this state of relief didn’t happy overnight. In spite of my terror of each passing decade, those milestone birthdays all brought reasons to celebrate, too.
For me, growing up means realizing those little steps that seemed like zeroes actually added up to a lot. I’m extraordinarily blessed and grateful to walk into my 60s with certain anxiety-inducing situations behind me:
- No more ticking biological clock (more like a biological time bomb).
- No more menopause issues either (my body belongs to me now).
- No more mortgage (the house is mine, no one can kick me out).
- My daughter’s about to finish college (bye-bye tuition bills).
What I care about now
Meanwhile, I remain surrounded by love and more opportunities to keep growing. Here’s a list of areas I’m focusing on, covered in earlier blog posts:
- Open letter to Chinese American Moms #blacklivesmatter
- Fighting for Hillary with Moms Demand Action
- My go-to mantra, from Anne Lamott’s “Bird by Bird”
- Adjusting to an adult relationship with my daughter
- Believing in my creative self
- Adjusting to a new commuter relationship with my boyfriend
- Why Chinese American women gain weight
- Therapy wisdom from my first shrink
- A book that saved my life & cured chronic back pain
- Chinese herbal medicine for good health
- How my dad’s forgiveness freed me from perfection
- How my Asian mom made me nuts: a love story
My priorities are like supportive pillars, keeping me quite calm and free.
But there’s also room in my life for more exploring. So, I’m wondering…
Hmm. What next.
Help me celebrate the 60s!
I would love your advice and observations. What are you seeing in your 60-ish moms, friends, relatives and significant others? How do they inspire you, or make you want to scream?
And if you’re past 60 or know others who are, any thoughts on getting to the 70s, 80s and beyond?